Living Well is Not About Perfection

At times it can seem like the idea of living well is a contest. Everyone is trying to out-do each other, keep up with Joneses and create social media content that suggests that they live the most glamorous life imaginable.  I am here to tell you that it is much easier than that and that the choices you make are not meant to be anxiety driven or made with the intent of impressing anyone but yourself.

I have written repeatedly and extensively on the subject of design and lifestyle and after more than 30 years running my own design firm, I can say with absolute conviction that your lifestyle, when approached with care and thoughtfulness is all you need.  At the end of the day your comfort, your desires, your home can be everything you crave it to be. 

2020 has been a bit of a s@#t show, to say the least.  We have gone inward and by doing so we have taken stock of our lives and our lifestyles.  We see our homes with a new set of eyes.  We want our homes to be more, say more, do more, to comfort and embrace us.  I want to remind you that a new perspective should not be a critical one.  There is no need to chastise yourself for not having noticed the “less-than” choices you may have previously made in your home.  This is a new day!  This is where you say, my home is my refuge, my retreat, my sanctuary.  This is my time.

So, that all sounds really terrific, right?  But, where do I begin? How does this transformation take place?  How fast do I get there?  Let me begin with the final question I have just posed.  Realize right now that you will never be finished, but the process can be enjoyable all along the way. Creating your perfect environment will always be challenging, because you are always changing and growing and your experiences continue to shape who you are continually.  This is a great thing!

I am constantly telling my clients the long-term success of your home’s design is solely based on the consideration that you give every decision.  What to exclude is just as important as what to include. Curating your home is not the same thing as decluttering.  The former is about choices you make to enhance your lifestyle. The latter is choices you make to clean up the noise in your home.  So, in the desire to help you find that jumping off place here are some thoughts on how to begin making those better choices.

·      Take stock of who you are today.  This will help you to decide where you are going with your home.  Are you more modern than you used to be? Or, do you love the memories and nostalgia of the things that bring joy to your life?  Maybe a bit of both?

·      Just because you want a change doesn’t mean you have to get rid of everything and start over.  This kind of design is for the lucky few.  For the rest of us, take incremental steps.

·      If you are going from one style to another, begin by bringing in elements of your new style to enliven what you already are living with.  A new lamp, light fixture, chair or coffee table can make a major statement no matter what the style.

·      When you are considering your home even little changes can have meaningful impact.  Try adding fresh flowers to a table top where you will see them regularly. I love them on my bathroom vanity and on my night table.

·      Paint is one of the easiest ways to make meaningful change.  Go bold!  It is not only the easiest but, probably the most cost-effective major change you can make because you are not stuck with a bad choice.  When choosing a paint color, you don’t have to worry about scale or fit.  If you are still hesitant, try painting one feature wall and see how it feels…and don’t forget about the ceiling. Sometimes adding color above your head is the best choice.

·      This one I hammer home with all my clients and it bears repeating. Start at your front door. Sweep, clean and paint, freshen your doormat, add new bulbs to lanterns, try a new door knocker, hardware or a door kick. You can also upgrade outdoors with an electronic doorbell and camera from Nest.

Once you are feeling confident in making changes to your home it might be time to turn that newly thoughtful eye on yourself and your personal choices. Remember a truly successful lifestyle is one that considers all aspects of living.  Try some of these ideas and see just how much better your life can be.

·      An ounce of prevention.  Taking care of your body is still the best defense and offense to living well.  Exercise has been a daily part of my life since I was 18 years old. You look better, you feel better and your clothes fit! Need I say more?

·      Buy wisely. I have always been a proponent of buying the best you can afford. This goes for everything in your home but, it should also be applied to your wardrobe.  It is too easy to buy fast and go cheap.   Looking your best requires a selective eye. The size label doesn’t matter, price doesn’t matter, fit is everything!

·      Be kind to yourself. Get the sleep you need, linger in the shower, use the products you love and make sure you leave your house each day feeling strong.

·      And if you really want to know one thing that can change your life…make your bed! Every day when you get up, make your bed and I promise you it is a small effort that keeps giving back.  It makes your life and your home seem more beautiful and organized and it is a joy to come home to at the end of the day.Not to mention it is much nicer getting into a freshly made at night.

·      Enjoy your home and share it with those you love.  A house is truly only a home when it is shared and welcomes those in your life that are important to you. A joyful home is a beautiful home. A home filled with love and laughter is always comfortable and welcoming, that is what makes it beautiful.

Creating the life you dream of is not about striving for perfection or trying to do it bigger or better than someone else. What you see on social media is an illusion and that feeling is fleeting.  Social media asks viewers to compare their lives to others and not focus on what is in front of them.  You are your own best arbiter of what is beautiful and what is best for you. Perfection is an illusion; your life is the reality.  You can shape it and decorate it anyway you want.  Remember, this is not brain surgery, you cannot get it wrong.  Trust in yourself and your ability to make the choices that are right for you.  And if any of your choices don’t feel quite right, that is a sign that you aren’t being as thoughtful as should be. Throw away doubt, look inside, forget about outside considerations and you will know what is right for you.  This is about you.

Live Well,

Dann

Designer Dann:  Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Houzz & Pinterest

www.foleystinnette.com